God

I used to believe that we were nothing without God, but I also believed that God was nothing without us. Now I believe the opposite is true.

Wendy Wagner, Horses on Heaven and Earth

It was mid-winter 2010/2011 and Wendy had just accepted an offer to forecast for the Chugach Avalanche Information Center.  At her going-away party in Salt Lake, long time avalanche hunter Tom Kimbrough and I arrived late, hoods on and carrying a bottle of Woodford Reserve.  At the time, my

Paying Attention

Whenever people ask me, Are you working right now? (I get asked this a lot), my answer is always the same: To the untrained eye, it may appear as if I’m not working.     But at the heart of the matter, I’m getting paid to pay attention. This, of

Pray Like Hell

The writer Brian Doyle writes occasionally about times when he gets down on his knees and prays like hell. He's an unapologetic Catholic and makes no excuses for Catholicism, but when he says Pray Like Hell, I think he means it. And so I will do this, and

That's all Folks!

Thanks again for subscribing to Meditations. This wraps up the 5th summer of writing. I'm too lazy to count, but perhaps 130? 140 Meditations over that time? None of them are perishable; feel free to look over some of the old ones. To me, it's a

A Meditation on Ego

The Ego will protect itself until End of Times, even until the End of our own time. In other words, have we not seen the Ego destroy its physical being to protect itself? And this says nothing of "Other". It's a tall task to live well

The Bad Apple

A long time ago, a friend of mine in Montana was fired from his job due to a safety violation. It amounted to him totalling a work truck on a state road after he crashed into a retaining wall. The investigation showed that a nail on the road had punctured

Summer's End

Summer's End Still in straw hat and sandals. See you next week -

Basho

A bee staggers out of the peony. His most recognized work is Narrow Road to the Deep North...also translated as Journey to the Interior. A Buddhist, Basho was often mistaken for a priest while on the road in the 1600s. But it was the banana tree at his home

Dear Backcountry Skier -

I first want you to know that I am one of you: I love skiing powder and hate crossing other tracks. I love making my own decisions in the mountains and I also love occasionally triggering avalanches. But as a backcountry avalanche forecaster for 26 years, there's something

Pull the Andon Cord!

You know the old saying, A guy on his own can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real idiocy, it takes teamwork? It's not true. Ok, it's not always true. But these ideas of Crew Resource Management......If you See Something, Say Something, etc..... have become

Sharpening the Pencil

Overheard at the monastery between the novice and the master - I once asked you why you were doing something and you replied that it was important to occasionally sharpen the pencil. But the thing for me - I keep breaking the lead point of my pencil. A bunch of

How Cormac McCarthy made a deal with the Devil...and got the better end of the deal

It was just before midnight, 1974, when the devil - Scratch - appeared to Charlie McCarthy.  McCarthy had just written Child of God (a book on loneliness, madness, depravity and other acts unfit for this polite audience) and Scratch saw some potential.  He offered McCarthy the opportunity to be the

Dusk in the Mountains

Dusk in the mountains. Boy sleeps on his mother’s arm. I‘ll live forever. Had a few 'technical difficulties' this morning, but I hope they are ironed out. Thanks again to Laurel Hunter for coming to the rescue. Thanks for subscribing to the Meditations. You'll

Avalanche

When I Heard the Collapse...

When I heard the collapse, I thought, No problem.     But this was before I understood avalanches as well as I do now.  The slope fractured like a pane of glass and even though I was on a 22° degree pitch at the top of the slope, it was as if

Meditations

A Meditation on Love and Cancer

...and he said that it was good that God kept the truths of life from the young as they were starting out or else they'd have no heart to start at all.   McCarthy.  All the Pretty Horses ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   I know this isn’t really part of the genre, but

Meditations

The Lion Tamer

Did you hear the one about the lion tamer who followed the directions by the book and in the end, the lion ate him anyway?

Avalanche

Fuck it

What is it about these two profound words that you hear with any decision of consequence? You’re looking over the tips of your skis down onto the Bobsled, a perfect white canvas on the north side of Gobblers Knob*.  Shadows of blue pierce the canvas, but that's

Meditations

These are the days

Japanese Enso.  Fairly well represents my view from the seat of the car, although the circle became nearly all black by the end.  Read on...   Hip surgery last Tuesday.  Unreliable narrator.   My wife and I leave surgery at 4pm.  We head to the Bengal Smiths and park in the shade.

Avalanche

Pascal's Wager with Deep Slab Instability

It’s early January.  Old depth hoar at the base of the snowpack.     He peers down the slope.  Steep and north facing.    V1: Pascal believes it’s stable and skis the slope.  The best run of his life.   V2: Pascal believes it’s stable and skis the slope.  It shatters

Meditations

It's Just Like Riding a Bike

A few thoughts on perception, decision making, and action.   Knowledge and Knowing.   Knowing and Acting. A few weeks ago, I sat down to chat with Ian McCammon at a coffee shop.  Ian has been a driving force in helping us better understand avalanche mechanics and behavioural science as it relates

Meditations

American Beauty

Even Georgia O'Keeffe would blush at this American Beauty I suspect Ms O'Keeffe would never consent to paint a rose, preferring instead her Sacred Datura (Jimson Weed).  * Her Jimson Weed/White Flower No. 1 (1932) sold for more than $44M in 2014.   Georgia O'Keeffe

Avalanche

Guilt

A few years ago, one of my best friends was caught in an avalanche somewhere north of here. The avalanche was triggered from above – another skier on the slope – and he suffered the onslaught of the avalanche. Deep within the belly of the whale, he pulled the trigger on his

Avalanche

Shame

Originally published a few years back in Ascent, the Backcountry Snow Journal   Not long ago, I heard a story from an old colleague of mine. It was his first year as an avalanche professional and he was out in the field with his supervisor. The two of them approached the